Time Turner

Susanne and Scott both got up to be with Paxton this morning as he worked through a gagging fit. They had to suction him out so he could breathe better. Susanne found that she was most successful if she could get the bulb syringe right up near his cleft palate opening. She would sometimes pull out stuff that looked like it was from a 500lb man.
Susanne had been working at a local veterinary office in NC over the last few weeks to help make ends meet. On average, she was working a couple of days per week. Her schedule was truly dependent on Paxton's needs. It felt good to get back to doing what she loved, but she still battled with leaving Paxton everytime. Poppy was able to watch the Bug on the days that Susanne had to work so that she would not have to worry about having to find someone for child care. At some point, she would need to find a nurse for back-up just in case Poppy was unavailable. It was nice that the practice she was at was so close to her parents' house. It literally took her five minutes to get there. She had a two hour lunch break in which she was able to go home. It was nice to see Paxton mid-day. She was comforted by the fact that he got to see her throughout the day like he was so used to. She enjoyed jumping back in to take over his care when she was able, which helped with consistency. Seeing his precious face gave her enough fuel to make it through her second shift. It was just getting the strength to leave him again, which was the tough part.

Susanne was overwhelmed at times with being a one man show. The traveling, the working, being the primary caretaker for Paxton, dealing with other issues that surfaced regarding things like insurance, bills, the rental property, or something else....she was just spent. She didn't want people to misunderstand. She found a lot of joy in taking care of Paxton and she loved being a veterinarian, she just wished she could have more time to just relax and enjoy life. If she could just clone herself or maybe even borrow Hermione's Time-Turner, then she would have the ability to get more done. It was just hitting her harder than ever because Paxton's first birthday was right around the corner. She couldn't believe how quickly time had passed. She wanted to slow it all down so she could savor every moment with her sweet precious angel. She could do without the rest.